Long Live the Queens? How Effeminate Gays are Hindering Progression

                Let us begin with a basic task: imagine a gay man.  Think of what they look like, what they’re wearing, their interests, everything.  Odds are, you imagined a young, white male, well dressed and groomed who has a deep rooted passion for fashion and all things Broadway.  If by chance you imagined something different, kudos to you.  You are one of the few.  Be proud.’

                So why did I have you imagine a gay man?  Fear not.  I am not conducting a social psychology experiment on stereotypes.  Instead, the argument that I hope to make in this blog post is that the stereotypical gay is extremely damaging to the gay community as a whole.  Of course, the notion that stereotypes can harm the stereotyped is axiomatic.  Indeed, consistent findings from both sociological and psychological research articles as well as conventional wisdom have obviated the need to discuss whether stereotypes can have negative impacts.  What makes this blog post different (i.e. what new insights does this blog post bring)?  I argue that the unique circumstance surrounding stereotyping of gays is that gay men often embrace the stereotypes (or at least, do nothing to challenge them).  Further, by embracing these stereotypes, gay men are alienating their own, forcing gays who do not conform to these stereotypes to feel that they are not ‘gay enough.’  The consequence? A divided gay community.  The implication? Difficulty in mobilizing to bring about social justice.  The future? Busted.  In order to support my argument, it is necessary to first consider the ubiquitous embrace of gay stereotypes by gay men themselves.  Next, explore how the adoption of these stereotypes by gay men alienate those who do not fit in with the ‘gay image.’ And finally, see how the division of the gay community hinders progression of any gay movement. 

                I have a friend, let’s call him John Doe.  Now John Doe self-identifies as gay, and gay he is.  Mr. Doe is well versed in the ‘finer things in life.’  He knows all there is to know about fine dining, wine and Broadway Showtunes, is extremely trendy and fashionable and is boyish and feminine in look and mannerisms.  In short, John Doe is the stereotypical gay man, aka Queen (the term ‘queen’ is a slang term used both negatively as an insult and positively as an identity).  The fact that my friend is a living, breathing gay stereotype isn’t in itself a problem.  Stereotypes, after all, are often rooted in some type of truth.  However, the problem is that the gay men who are the most visible, the ones who are given the most media coverage and the ones who are seen as being the poster children of the Gay Rights Movement are the ones who live up to society’s stereotype of what it means to be gay.  Further, the problem is that a lot of gay individuals embrace these stereotypes and tend to define themselves by said stereotypes, using them as a gauge to identify just how gay they are.  I will elaborate more on this ‘gay-uge’ when I discuss alienation of some gay men. In the meantime, to drive my point on the pervasiveness and power of the queen home, I will turn to the Logo.

                The other night, I was browsing the channels and landed on Logo, the LGBTQ television station.  After only 1 hour and 30 minutes of programming, it became quite clear what audience this station catered to.  No.  Not the LGBTQ community.  Rather, a subset of the community.  Namely effeminate gay men (queens).  Rupaul’s Drag Race, A-List New York, Drag U, 1 Girl 5 Gays, all of these shows have one thing in common; they feature the most flamboyant, superficial and stereotypical gays imaginable.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy these shows.  However, I find it ridiculous that these programs perpetuate gay stereotypes, elevate the ‘gay queen’ and ignore the wide amount of diversity in the gay community.  The fact that this network, which is geared specifically to the LGBTQ community, is entirely one-dimensional with regards to its depiction of gay men, provides some evidence for my claim that the gay community is defined by the queen.  It would seem that in order to be gay, you must possess the characteristics displayed by the queens.  Is this just the way things are?  Is there no reason to be concerned?

                Actually, there is a reason for concern.  The concern stems from the wedge that is forming between the powerful and visible queen, and the gay men who do not fit in with culture’s (both mainstream and the gay subculture’s) mold of gayness. This metaphorical wedge is contributing to a divide in the community (a divide that has existed for some time now).  As was previously mentioned, the stereotypical gay man is young, white, effeminate and ‘cultured.’  Additionally, they often speak with a lisp and have overly feminine mannerisms.  Essentially, gay men are equated with heterosexual women in terms of behavior (interesting seeing gender expression need not determine sexual orientation and vice versa).  If this is what it means to be gay, what about the gay men who don’t uphold these stereotypes?  What about the hairy men who know nothing about Patti Lupone or what meal to pair Cabernet Sauvignon with?  What about the racial and ethnic minorities who identify first and foremost with their racial and ethnic identity?  What about the older gay men who find themselves fading out of existence as they age in a subculture that values youth and beauty?  Alienation.  They begin feeling that they do not belong.  In fact, they are constantly evaluating their gayness, comparing themselves to the queens (i.e. using the gay-uge), and perpetuating the existing feelings of alienation.  At its lowest level, feelings of alienation manifest as not attending Pride events or disengaging from LFBTQ activism.  At its most extreme level, alienation manifests as a total rebuking and social distancing from the gay community (i.e. men on the Down Low; racial and ethnic minority men who think of gayness as a White phenomenon).  Whether it be low level or extreme, any type of alienation has a negative impact on the gay community.  Not only would it be tragic to ignore the rich cultural and personal diversity that exists within the gay community via alientation, but alienation would also be detrimental to bringing about social change.

                With an understanding of how gay men embrace and embody gay stereotypes and how said embrace/embodiment alienates some members of the gay community, it is now imperative to see how these two factors hinder progression of our community as a whole.  There are several theories regarding social movements (i.e. deprivation theory, culture theory).  Though each theory offers a unique take on the creation and sustainability of social movements, all theories call for two basic ideas: consensus and convergence.   Consensus refers to the idea that everyone is on the same page regarding their deprivation and the steps they will take to rid said deprivation (think of injustice frames as used in culture theory).  Convergence is the step beyond agreeing on what to do.  Indeed, convergence is actually coming together and working toward a common goal.  When it comes to consensus, the gay community has that criteria for social movements in the bag.  Social equality is the goal.  When it comes to convergence, however, the community could use some work.  Though I do not believe that queens are intentionally weakening the movement, I do believe that the embodiment of gay stereotypes by a highly visible subgroup of the gay community leads to alienation, which in term leads to difficulty in mobilizing the entire gay community.  Don’t get me wrong.  I acknowledge that mobilization for LGBTQ issues has been great in recent years and that the community as a whole is making several gains.  But think of just how much stronger the movement could be if we didn’t isolate our own.  Think of how beneficial it would be to society at large if we began challenging the gay stereotypes and displaying the diversity of the community.   In sum, think of how much better things would be if we dethroned the queens.

                In conclusion, effeminate, gay men (queens) are hindering the progression of the gay rights movement by contributing to the alienation of  gay men who don’t fit the ‘gay image.’  I do not mean for this post to be an attack on my effeminate, gay brothers.  Indeed, I honor and respect the diversity of the gay community.  That being said, I refuse to be defined by stereotypes upheld by a few.

~KJSW